Answer the million dollar question and show
how you roll to help charity and a nurse.
FOR CENTURIES, ONE QUESTION REMAINS UNANSWERED…
“Theory of relativity was easy,
but does toilet paper go
OVER or UNDER?”
- Albert Einstein (allegedly)
“I don’t like surprises, especially in the bathroom.
Over or under?
I still don’t know.”
-Oprah Winfrey (allegedly)
“I cannot finish Neuralink
until we solve this problem.
We need synchronicity,
no matter the cost. ”
- Elon Musk (allegedly)
Here’s your chance to
end the debate.
THE MILLION DOLLAR QUESTION :
How do you think Toilet Paper should be placed?
MAKE YOUR CHOICE, FOR A “SMALL” FEE:
Seriously, is this a joke?
No, this is not a joke.
COVID-19 has shown the world how toilet paper is apparently VERY important!
As such, whichever position is chosen first for “only” $1 000 000
will become the Gold Standard for toilet paper placement, worldwide.*
THE $1 000 000 INCLUDES A FRESH ROLL OF TOILET PAPER SIGNED BY THE ARTIST!
So, where does this $1M end up?
$500k to Charity
$500k to help a Nurse
The Artist behind
An accomplished musician, photographer and filmmaker, the Artist resides somewhere in North America and prefers to be anonymous because they believe the attention should be focused at supporting the charities, supporting the nurse in finding a home to retire in and, of course,
ending the toilet paper debate once and for all!
“My mom has done nothing but support me and encourage me to work hard at accomplishing my artistic dreams” said the Artist of the Great Toilet Paper Debate. “Making money as an artist is never easy and I wish I could buy her a house (let alone one for myself!) but I am wiling to try anything to help her out.”
“Do I think this $1M art project will work? I have no idea - but if there is only a 0.00001% chance of this working then it is worth trying because my mom taught me it never hurts to ask for help, so here I am asking for help.”
“So if you can find the kindness in your heart and your pockets run deep, please help my mom retire in the peace and comfort she has earned. Plus you get to brag to your friends that you helped many great charities and, most importantly, ended the Great Toilet Paper Debate by spending $1m on a roll of toilet paper!”
Half of the money from the ridiculous $1 000 000 purchase from this the toilet paper art project will be donated evenly to the following charities:
None of the above charities are affiliated with the Great Toilet Paper Debate but they will get the money if this project is successful!
Stopgap Foundation is an accessibility-focused charity whose aim is to create a barrier-free world, one ramp at a time.
The Sheldrick Wildlife Trust “operates the most successful orphan elephant rescue and rehabilitation program in the world.”
Save The Children (Asia Division) “provides lifesaving health care and nutrition to children in impoverished nations” and works “in the poorest and most vulnerable communities throughout the continent.”
WIRES “aims to actively rehabilitate and preserve Australian wildlife and inspire others to do the same” and recovery In the aftermath of the catastrophic fires.
Amref Health Africa helps support “sustainable health access to communities in Africa through solutions in human resources for health, health services delivery and investments in health.”
Half of the money from this insane (yet possibly genius) idea of selling art for $1M will be given to a nurse to help her buy a house.
The nurse, the mother of the Artist behind The Great Toiler Paper Debate, is a 66-year-old woman who has been working in healthcare since her early 20’s.
Though she is eligible for retirement, she is continuing
to work in healthcare, even during the COVID-19 crisis.
“My mom is an inspiring and powerful woman who has dedicated her entire career to helping the community by advocating on behalf of marginalized groups to ensure they receive the best healthcare possible” said the Artist of the Great Toilet Paper Debate.
“She spent many years working nights so she could be there to take care of her kids during the day. That kind of dedication to raising her children had a positive and palpable effect on our childhood. Now it’s time for me to repay the favour by finding a way to help her obtain her lifelong goal of owning her own home.”
The Artist behind the Great Toilet Paper debate would prefer to keep their mother’s identity unknown to the public for privacy reasons and as she does not know about this art project.
“I want to surprise her as she continually surprises me with her limitless ability to work hard to take care of others” said the Artist.
“So for only one million dollars, you can end the toilet paper debate while doing some good for charity and a make a dream come true for a nurse. It’s a win-win-win!”
OPEN DISCLAIMER: There may have to be taxes or fees required to be paid for $1 000 000 and thus all funds will be allocated evenly after deductions. If you do pay the $1M, you will get a roll of toilet paper signed by the Artist which is considered a piece of art as part of the purchase. You can use the toilet paper if you want, too! The Artist will also be happy to provide some form of proof to show the money was actually donated to charity and that the nurse bought a house! Please note, the Artist will not make any money from this art project and because it’s artistic toilet paper you are buying, there are no refunds or exchanges and the toilet paper (doubly ply) is sold as-is.
“This is a chance for celebs to take a stand. Enough sh!t talking and put your money where your mouth is.
We need to end the debate, today!
-Ricky Gervais (allegedly)
Buy this option to end the debate and ensure the “OVER” position is the only position toilet paper should be placed no matter where or how!
$1 000 000
Buy this option to wake up every morning knowing the “UNDER” position is now considered the standard position for TP!
$1 000 000
ONLY 1 OF THE ABOVE CAN BE SOLD! ALL SALES ARE FINAL SALE!
Now, time to choose…
* Though there is no legal grounds to make the world put toilet paper in any particular fashion, nor is the artist behind this project saying they will ensure the orientation of toilet paper will change in any fashion, the money will actually go to charity and to support the purchase of a house for a nurse. Consider this a novelty art purchase. The purchaser also agrees they won’t sue the artist because of anything toilet paper related, because that would be insane. But as stated, the money will go to the charities and to the nurse and I am sure a reasonable method to demonstrate the placement of said monies can be created keeping in mind that the artist requires the right to privacy for their mother. ** None of the famous people (Elon Musk, Albert Einstein or Oprah Winfrey) have any affiliation with this. You will get a roll of toilet paper and nothing more but by giving your shit ton of money money to this artistic project you realize you get nothing in return except for the satisfaction of helping an artist out by supporting multiple charities and helping buy a house for a nurse which includes toilet paper signed by the Artist. Shopping of the toilet paper signed will be covered via ground but no insurance is provided for shipping.. You won’t own the house, the nurse will own the house. Your name, background, photo or other information won’t be shared unless you say it is ok to do so and all reasonable effort to ensure your privacy will be done if so desired. There might be taxes or fees on the $1 000 000 and if there are then they will be taken off the $1 000 000 and the remainder will be split - i.e. the artist will donate 50% of the remaining to the charities mentioned and the other 50% of the remaining (less taxes amount) will be given to a nurse to buy a house. There are no refunds, exchanges, all sales final and the toilet paper you receive is sold as-is without warranty, insurance and should you choose to buy the OVER or UNDER option there is no implied or expressed warranty and the people behind the Great Toilet Paper Debate will not be held legally liable for anything. The money for the house will pay for the house, property, repairs and any other services related to moving and any remaining amount will be up to the nurse to depend how they choose to spend it. I did not ask the charities to be involved I will just donate the money to them myself as the Artist. None of the quotes are real (Elon, Oprah or Albert) And no this is not a joke I am just trying to find a creative way to help my mom because it is bloody hard trying to make money as an Artist as it is and not everyone can make Kevin Hart money (but if you know Kev please send him this URL). Also feel free to contact Warren Buffet if you know him, same goes with the amazon.com guy, Elon Musk, Ricky Gervais, Oprah Winfrey or any other super rich person. Thanks and have fun and the Artist behind the Great Toilet Paper debate or any person related to the project will not be held legally or financially liable as a result of this project. But the money will be donated to charity and to buy a house for a nurse cause if it wasn’t the Artist would be a right dickhead.